Happy Valentine's Day

Today marks the 20th year I have spent with my Valentine. The first few years, he was my high school sweetheart and then, eventually, my husband. Farrel and I have very different personalities. He is laid-back and rarely worries about things that he can't change. When he has the kids for the day, they might or might not eat on a regular schedule, whether or not they brush their teeth will always be a gamble, and you can bet that bedtime will be at least an hour later than it would have been if I had been home. Farrel knows everybody and is as comfortable talking to a city or school official as he is our next door neighbor. He is one of the hardest working people I know. He encourages me to make time for myself and will gladly adjust his schedule so that I can have time to recharge. He loves my parents, my brother, and my extended family and has never complained about attending a family event. He was happy when I chose to give up my career in order to be a stay-at-home mom. He also encouraged me to finish my Ph.D., knowing that someday I would go back to the work I loved so much. He kept me sane when I was expecting Nolan and raising my other two precious kids while the project of my life, my dissertation, mocked me with deadlines. More than once, he told me he knew I would finish, even when I had serious doubts about my own abilities. He is a genuinely kind person who, after all this time, still likes me--not just loves me because I am his wife and that is what he is supposed to do--he really likes me and for that and so much more, I love him.

Farrel has never forgotten a Valentine's Day. When we were young, it was cards and flowers and little pieces of jewelry that I still have in a keepsake box. After we got married, he would make plans for restaurants or send beautiful bouquets to work. Always, I would get hand-written notes in elaborate cards telling me how much I mean to him. We spent 7 years married without children and then added our 3 little Valentines to our family. We don't get to take little get-aways any more like we used to, but Farrel still remembers to make the effort. Today, it was lunch at Petra while Nolan was at preschool. We laughed and caught up and remembered why we have chosen to spend the last 20 Valentine's Days together. Much love to you, my sweetheart, and to my little sweeties, too. Happy Valentine's Day, everybody!